Islands of Adventure: Jurassic Park Toilets Offer Visitors Some Jungle Love

Islands of Adventure Theme Park
Jurassic Park Toilet
Universal Orlando Resort
1000 Universal Studios Plaza
Orlando, FL USA
www.universalorlando.com

Where is it?

Enter the Jurassic Park area from the Toon Lagoon side and approach the area's centerpiece, Jurassic Park The Ride, which is a fun but short log flume ride that lets you take a tame cruise through the famed dinosaur land. Of course, halfway through things turn bad and you enter a restricted area filled with the nastier creatures from the films. The ride ends with an 85-foot drop into water.

Anyway, as you approach the ride, there is a small gift kiosk on your left (actually, the area where you exit the ride). The bathrooms are to the left of that kiosk, around back.

What's it like?

Given its proximity to Toon Lagoon, you expect these toilets to be equally horrific to those. After all, these are the closet facilities to those awful ones and if families are in a rush and those toilets are full then these are your closest bet for comfort.

But the walk from Toon Lagoon to here is a bit long in terms of theme-park distances -- maybe five to seven minutes -- and these toilets are a bit hidden from view because of the set design of the area, which is filled with jungle vegetation and twisty paths, so maybe finding it is harder than it seems.

I don't know. Either way, these were lovely toilets. Roomy, filled with a fun green and brown tile design on the walls and an inviting beige tile on the floors, very clean, private feeling and odor-free. If only more of the toilets in the park were like this one -- and sadly, only one other was, the Lost Continent bathrooms, and those were slightly better than these.

Set-up wise, it's a lot like the Hulk Coaster toilets, in that the urinals are set along the back wall, the toilet stalls are opposite them, and the sink stations are up front. Only the room itself has a few more corners to round. The colorful tile work makes it feel like the place is more spacious than it really is, and makes the place all the more inviting.

One of the nicer touches is the way the walls jet out around the sinks, forming small, sort of unspoken, barriers between the stations. I also liked the somewhat tucked away location of the toilets, which make you feel like you're entering a sort of bungalow oasis. Sure, it's a theme park bungalow, but nice nonetheless.

It's a clean smelling and clean-looking environment, as said earlier. My only complaint was in finding a bit of poo remnants from a previous visitor in a toilet stall. (No, I wasn't looking for it.) But then, if you take that as an indication that the toilet hasn't been cleaned in a while and that the place was still nearing immaculate condition, it only increases my respect for these facilities. In many ways, they reminded me a lot of the toilets I experienced at the Luxor in Las Vegas.

And, it should be noted that these are some of the furthest-away toilets from the entrance in the park. Definitely worth a stop while here, especially if you're needing a quiet toilet that's clean, fun and away from the maddening crowd.

Marks out of 10:

8. One of the better toilets in the park.

Comments to the Management:

Unlike some of the other Islands of Adventure toilets, this one feels well-kept and well-maintained. It might need another visitor or two during the day from attendants, but otherwise you've done a fine job here.

Islands of Adventure: Second Super Hero Island Toilets Suck

Islands of Adventure Theme Park
Super Hero Island Toilet 2
Universal Orlando Resort
1000 Universal Studios Plaza
Orlando, FL USA
www.universalorlando.com

Where is it?

From the Hulk Coaster, head further into Super Hero Island, towards the Spiderman ride, also one of the park's biggest draws (and one of the best rides I've ever been on -- just outstanding fun!).

Pass Spiderman and keep on going down that main path. You'll see a "Frozen Ice" stand on your right -- the letters drawn out in a comic-book-inspired font that will make you think this is the most extreme frozen ice stand in the world (and perhaps it is, though I didn't stop there on my way to the loo).

Across the street from that stand is the restrooms, marked by the word "RESTROOMS" in large comic-book lettering (the same way as you see them by the Cafe 4/Hulk Coaster toilets).

What's it like?

The Cafe 4/Hulk Coaster toilets I experienced were in a very crowded area filled with kids and adults, and they ended up being clean and nice. Not outstanding, but nice.

These facilities were surrounded by just as many people but the experience was opposite. There was a sharp smell of urine in here. The floor was covered in spilled water, paper and other substances. The toilet seats I spotted were dotted with pee. I am wondering if those little target stickers at the Cafe 4/Hulk Coaster toilets actually helped people aim, because these toilets were filled with the aftereffects of many marksmen who missed their marks. Ick.

Which is sad, because this place is a little roomier and friendlier in design than the Cafe 4/Hulk Coaster toilets. Though the differences are not great. There is still a row of urinals against the back wall and a stretch of toilet commodes opposite it. A set of sink stations sits ups front. The rest of the bathroom kind of unfolds behind the sinks.

The tile pattern on the wall is warmer here -- like the Cafe 4/Hulk Coaster toilets the walls and floor have a gray tile pattern and bland gray floor tiles, but the walls are also dotted with colorful blue, red and yellow highlights, which are more pleasant than the Cafe 4/Hulk Coaster toilets use of straight gray.

Still, despite those advantages, I could not look past the messiness of the place, nor its urine-based stink. As with the Cafe 4/Hulk Coaster toilets, I understand there will be some messiness involved. After all, this place is visited by thousands of people each week. But the traffic around these toilets and the Cafe 4/Hulk Coaster toilets was about the same (at least, from what I could see) and I was surprised by how much cleaner the Cafe 4/Hulk Coaster toilets were over these.

Not the worst toilets I experienced while at Islands of Adventure (those are the Toon Lagoon facilities -- review coming soon), but these were definitely in the lower echelon. Avoid if possible and walk the extra 10 minutes to the Jurassic Park toilets if you're in dire need.

Marks out of 10:

4. A nice mass-market design marred by a lack of upkeep.

Comments to the Management:

Simply put: You need to schedule your cleaners to visit this place more often. These toilets should be much cleaner than the Cafe 4/Hulk Coaster toilets (in case I haven't used that term enough in this review). They are more removed from the main action and not set next to a sit-down dining establishment. I'm thinking that because of their location, they are not cleaned as regularly -- that's a shame. These are good toilets that deserve better.

Universal Studios: Toilets Evoke Spirit of Gotham Through Realistic Grime and Decor

Universal Studios Orlando Theme Park
New York Area Toilet
Universal Orlando Resort
1000 Universal Studios Plaza
Orlando, FL USA
www.universalorlando.com

Where is it?

Head to the New York section of the park, an area that has a number of sound stages that, from the outside, look like traditional NYC tenements and skyscrapers but inside house non-NYC-inspired rides like the fun Mummy coaster and special effects-driven Twister.

Once there, look for the area's gaming arcade, which can be found by locating the large sign reading "Games." The gaming arcade is set inside a corner building, with one side facing the main walkway and the other facing an alley.

Instead of going in the arcade's main entrance, which faces the street, go past it and down the alley (you'll see another entrance for the "Games" section here). Beyond that, you'll see a sign for the "Gotham Ice Company" hanging above an archway that looks like an entrance into a sewer system. That's actually the bathrooms.

What's it like?

You kind of expect the inside of the bathrooms here to evoke the spirit of NYC, given the amount of effort put into the facades of the New York area buildings themselves. And to some degree, that concept is exhibited well here.

These are large, somewhat sprawling facilities that look and feel very much like the larger toilets experienced in Islands of Adventure. Visitors here will find the urinals set up along one wall, the toilet stalls set up behind them and the sinks arranged in various stations and divided by the walls of the place.

The central area is a bit more spread out than the larger facilities at Islands of Adventure, allowing for more walking room between the toilets and sinks and such. Also, because of that roomy center, the area also feels more bustling than it is. All of which captures a certain spirit of NYC, if you think about it.

However, as you can imagine it's nothing like the real thing -- and don't expect these to be like the impressive Grand Central Station toilets), but as theme park toilets go these do capture a sense of urbanity, which I found commendable.

The decor helps achieve this: The tile work here is modest yet decorative: Standard gray tile on the floor, straightforward white tile on much of the walls and a simple black and white tile pattern about three-quarters up -- all of which combined gives it a somewhat old-fashioned turn-of-the-century feel. Think McCormick and Schmick's Orlando or Philadelphia's Davio's, just without the modernist sheen and polish and with much more room.

On the flip side, the place was also somewhat filthy -- not in the open areas but in the smaller zones where you don't look at first but then find yourself unable to look at afterward. While the toilets were pretty clean (though not immaculate), there was lots -- and I mean LOTS -- of water on the floor, and with that came a prominent stink of urine -- so strong that I wondered if half of the pee intended for the toilets had landed on the floor instead.

More disturbing were the poofs of white "substance" found beneath the sinks. I must use the word "substance" here because I wasn't sure what this stuff actually was. Was it coagulated soap suds, squished up paper towels, dragged along toilet paper or cleaner that somehow gelled in the nether-spaces of the bathroom? Either way, I stayed away from it, fearing it might spawn in the bathroom and swallow me whole.

Of course, given that -- and the smell -- the place also felt pretty much like an authentic NYC public toilet, wouldn't you say?

Marks out of 10:

6. Nice design and would have rated higher were it not for the foul odors, mass amounts of spilled water and identifiable white "substance."

Comments to the Management:

I like the place, only it needs stronger air fresheners and clearly needs to be mopped more regularly. I imagine that once the white "substance" issue grows out of hand, venerable cleaning SWAT teams much be sanctioned to tackle the job successfully.

Old World Charm Gets Lost Inside Teutonic Bathroom at EPCOT's UK Pavilion

United Kingdom Pavilion Bathroom
EPCOT
Orlando, FL USA
www.epcot.com

Where is it?

This is pretty deep inside Disney's EPCOT theme park.

To get here, head to the United Kingdom Pavilion. Once there, look for the Rose and Crown pub, which is pretty much in the center of the pavilion. When you see it, look across the street, and you'll see a quaint little English garden set before a structure that looks a little like Windsor Castle.

There's a set of archways at the far end of the garden -- the bathrooms are inside those archways. (There's also a sign on the central street there, indicating which way the bathrooms are, as well as which way the Rose and Crown Pub is, in case you need to get back there and can't quite remember where it is.... for obvious reasons, of course.)

What's it like?

Like with the China Pavilion at EPCOT, the United Kingdom Pavilion houses a small array of structures that sum up traditional English experience for the non-initiated. There's the Tea Shoppe (notice the spelling of "Shoppe" -- doesn't that scream "English?"), the Rose and Crown Pub, a fish and chips place, some quaint gardens, windy streets reminiscent of a quaint Cotswolds village and architecture that looks like it was modeled after postcards of famous castles, like the aforementioned Windsor dwelling.

The pavilion itself makes for a nice diversion, but unlike China Pavilion, there isn't any attraction here (no movie; though there is a Beatle-mania-type show a few times a day) and no fine dining restaurant, unless you count the pub here as being fine dining. (It's got table service, and it charges $9 per beer, whereas the fish and chips place is just a fast food counter.)

The bathrooms look nice on the outside -- as said earlier, the architecture outside them is reminiscent of Windsor Castle and the like. Inside, however, they are just your standard mass market multi-person toilet -- nothing special. They're very hectic and busy too because they sit in the dead center of a busy thoroughfare between the France and Canada Pavilions, both of which have great fine dining restaurants and decent attractions to see.

Of course, given its bland interior, I can't complain on its lack of ambition as the bathroom at the Lotus Blossom Cafe in EPCOT's China Pavilion exhibited too much ambition and as a result created a somewhat unpleasant toilet environment. So there is something to be said for having a straightforward practical restroom on premises.

But at the same time you're letdown by the fact that the outside of the place has lots of personality and the inside doesn't.

Anyway, this is a long, rectangular environment. When you enter, you first face an area of sinks and counter spaces (for changing babies and such). Turn left from there and you see a long stretching room with a long row of urinals on one side and a long row of toilet stalls on the back, with the handicap stalls being in the back corner. (Why they are all the way back there, since it makes it hard to get to for anyone with disabilities, is anyone's guess?)

Regular stalls are average in size and are divided by beige metal stall walls; the urinals are separated by stainless steel dividers. Because of the shape of the place, and the fact that many people visit here, anyone in the stalls will have to endure lots of noise and activity. During my visit, I encountered lots of shouted conversations and many kids, who ran around frantically, bumping into things and having water fights. This was actually what I expected to experience at the Spiderman toilets in Super Hero Island in Islands of Adventure, to be honest -- just kind of a bathroom free for all, if you will.

The sinks, urinals and toilets all have autoflush (soap dispensers are manual, as is in all Disney parks bathrooms, it seems). This isn't a bad thing to have in such a frenetic environment. The place is brimming with spilled water and paper and other trash (even though it's frequently cleaned by the crew -- just too hard to keep tip top when this many people flush in, I guess) so the less I have to touch anything, the better.

The decor is pretty Teutonic, with an off-kilter brown and white-tile checkerboard pattern on the floor and white tiled walls with a black tile highlight. Again, nothing exciting -- pretty plain Jane, like what we saw at the Grand Canyon's Desert View bathroom or at TooJay's Original Gourmet Deli in Orlando. No bits of cozy English culture, no personality whatsoever. Soulless and bland and very hectic.

A little of that would have been great -- I'm not asking for something as eccentric as what we we saw in the bathrooms outside Westminster Abbey or Bleinhem Palace, or even something as high end classy as the majestic Lumley Castle Hotel, but at least some effort to mimic the decor of the Pavilion outside would have been nice.

Marks out of 10:

5. Would have been higher had the place not been so filled with frantic children, water, and trash and shown a little personality.

Comments to the Management:

Clearly, the cleaning schedule you've placed this place on isn't enough -- you need to double the crews here to ensure it stays clean, because it's a crowded mess as is. Also, adding some decor would soften the blow of overcrowding and messiness some. Look at what was done inside the bathrooms at the Paris Las Vegas for some inspiration, or the Lost Continent Toilet at Islands of Adventure.

Islands of Adventure: Super Hero Island Toilets Just So So

Islands of Adventure Theme Park
Super Hero Island Toilet 1
Universal Orlando Resort
1000 Universal Studios Plaza
Orlando, FL USA
www.universalorlando.com

Where is it?

After entering the park, follow the masses to the Incredible Hulk Coaster, one of the park's main draws. Once there, look across the street from it for the Cafe 4 restaurant, named after the Fantastic Four superheroes. (It's just a fast food restaurant, nothing more.)

Approach the entrance to Cafe 4 and then before heading in look immediately to your left. The restrooms will be there -- hard to miss because the word "RESTROOMS" is cast over the entrance wall to the facilities in a font looking a lot like comic book writing.

What's it like?

The rule of thumb for most theme park bathrooms is that the further you are from people, the cleaner and more enjoyable the bathroom experience.

Given that this bathroom is located across from one of the park's biggest attractions (the ferocious Hulk coaster), and that I found the ride itself swarmed with people both looking warily at the ride and gearing up for standing in line for it, and the fact that Cafe 4 is the first proper eatery you come across while in the park (there are stands and such in the main greeting area, but nothing to sit down and enjoy a meal at), I prepared myself for the worst here. Lots of people + scary ride=Messy toilet. Thus, I expected this toilet to be truly horrid, smelly, filthy, even vomit strewn.

However, that wasn't the case. I was pleasantly surprised by what I found here. While it wasn't the cleanest toilet I experienced inside the park (that would be the one in the Lost Continent) I was amazed to find that the toilets here were clean, spacious and a cut above the functional base.

These are sprawling facilities, with a row of about 10 or so urinals fixed into one wall and a string of about eight toilet stalls opposite it. A stretch of sink stations is found in the front, with paper towel and soap dispensers fixed between them. A baby-changing station is in the front, opposite a large stretch mirror, which is the only mirror in the place. (Clearly, people don't want to see how horrified they look after getting off the Hulk ride, eh?)

The fixtures themselves are nothing special: White porcelain toilets, sinks and urinals. The walls are covered with a friendly gray and white tile pattern and the floors have a standard mattered gray tile on them (like what you see at several places). There are no decorations on the walls, just the tile work.

In all, a pretty straightforward and clean bathroom, well-maintained and inviting. A bit airport-like in feel, but with a bit of a friendlier facade. Then again, what more do you want from the place, seeing that thousands of people visit the facilities each week?

One oddity to note: The urinals all had little target stickers in them, the stickers themselves being about the size of a nickle. Not sure what they were there for (didn't want to get too close, since they're in urinals) but still I took note. Is that to help children with target practice?

Marks out of 10:

6. A decent, functional mass market toilet. A bit sterile but then that's kind of expect, given the volume the place does.

Comments to the Management:

Not much to say here. If anything, I would say that the biggest complaint is that the place lacks the creative design found in the area outside, and you kind of expect a little more flash inside here. (Heck, if Vegas hotels can do it, why not here?)

But then again, seeing that this is the first bathroom people cross when they come inside (outside of the one by the ticket booth, which was too much of a madhouse to review), and that it's beside a major attraction, it could have been much worse. So in a way, I must give kudos to that as well.

Islands of Adventure: Lost Continent Toilets Are the Park's Hidden Gems

Islands of Adventure Theme Park
Lost Continent Toilet
Universal Orlando Resort
1000 Universal Studios Plaza
Orlando, FL USA
www.universalorlando.com

Where is it?

Head through the Lost Continent area, which contains the thrilling Dueling Dragons coaster, and look for The Pearl Factory, a moderately sized kiosk, set in a faux Middle East bazaar area of the park, where you can buy an oyster that contains a pearl in it (something theme parks tend to offer, for some reason).

When facing The Pearl Factory, you'll see a small passageway to its left. Go down that passageway and you'll come to the bathrooms, which look like they're set into a stone building.

What's it like?

The best toilets in the park and the ones you'll want to go to if you want to experience a spotless, peaceful bathroom experience.

How these are the best is a mystery, however. Yes, they are tucked away and a bit harder to find than some of the other ones. Yes, they are in an area that really doesn't attract lots of kids. Yes, they are one of the furthest facilities from the entrance to the park. But then they are also somewhat close to Seuss Landing (review coming soon), which is one of the park's two big kiddie areas (the other being Toon Lagoon and its horrid toilets). So I' m not sure what to tell you.

Still, these are wonderful facilities. The walls here are covered with a mix of sandstone tiles and elegant mosaic tiles (very reminiscent of the Luxor bathrooms, only more sophisticated and intricate in its tile work).

The floors have that same sandstone tile on them, only with thicker grout lines. Lighting is soft but bright enough so that you don't feel like the shadows are looming.

This isn't the biggest bathroom experienced in the park -- that honor probably goes to the Hulk Coaster toilets -- but they aren't much smaller, maybe a few units shy and that's all. Also, the design here is different than the other IOA toilets, in that the location is shaped more circularly. You enter, and to your left are a set of urinals. Behind them, on the back wall, is a stretch of toilet stalls. On the right wall are the sink stations -- and like the Jurassic Park bathrooms, the walls jet out around the sinks to create little cubbies for them. Very nice.

A large central pillar (probably housing the supply closet) sits in middle of the bathroom, and because of that the walking areas somehow feel roomier than at the other places -- perhaps because the areas around the urinals and toilets and sinks aren't multi-use. Either you're going to go to the urinals and then across to the sinks or you're not -- there's no room for sharing, essentially.

The sinks, urinals and toilets are all white porcelain but are heightened to near-artistic quality thanks to the intricate tile work and mosaic work behind them. Everything I saw was immaculately cleaned and the air was fresh-smelling and not at all dank or tinged with urine, which is sometimes the case with such bathrooms. A wonderful bathroom experience.

Marks out of 10:

9. Easily the best in the park and definitely worth visiting if you're in need. And certainly the park's hidden gem.

Comments to the Management:

Near-perfection. In fact, pipe in a little soft music and you may have yourself something approaching Vegas standards.

Restroom at Flame Tree Restaurant in Animal Kingdom is Wonderful, But Watch Out for the Birds On the Way Over

Disney's Animal Kingdom Theme Park
Conservation Station Bathroom
660 W. Savannah Circle
Lake Buena Vista, FL USA
disneyworld.disney.go.com/parks/animal-kingdom/

Where is it?

From the order counter, cross the main walkway in front of you and enter the restaurant's outdoor seating area, located across the way. Go through the sea of tables and gazebos there, walking all the while to the part of the dining room that's furthest away from the counter. (There are well-placed signs set up, leading you to the bathrooms, so it's not hard to find.)

Eventually you will veer around the back of a building and to the left, where you will see a bunch of Asian/Aztec-like ruins surrounding the entrance to the bathroom.

What's it like?

The smells of barbecue suckered me into this place.

Located in between the Dinoland U.S.A. area of Animal Kingdom and the Tree of Life, the park's central attraction, Flame Tree Grill is just a typical fast food counter-service dining spot serving barbecue, chicken and a small assortment of sandwiches.

But the park seems to pipe in the smell of BBQ into the area around the restaurant (or maybe the kitchen had fans coming out of it and pointed in our direction), making it all but impossible for anyone walking by to not think about sinking his or her teeth into some succulent BBQ.

Needless to say, I was one of its suckers. After a few hours of schlepping around the park, I found myself starving and the smells of the BBQ from this place seemed more like a beacon of joy than anything else when I passed. I gave in, ordered up a plate of ribs and chicken and took them to the outdoor seating area across the way, where I tucked in and -- ironically enough -- had to fend off a slew of birds (including ducks, gulls and a few other species) while eating. Apparently, the birds get fed so often by fellow diners that they are comfortable enough to come up to your table and snatch the food right from your plate. Talk about adventure! (And more on those birds later.....)

Anyway, what's annoying is that the BBQ isn't all that great. Not terrible (the chicken that came with the meal was pretty dry, the ribs okay, but the sauces were decent, especially their fruitier, less-spicy variety) but not nearly as good as what you think you'll be getting when you first smell it cooking from down the way. Perhaps it's because it's hard to eat it warm while you're finding a seat in the place's overcrowded dining area, or perhaps its because it's hard to eat when you're surrounded by birds. (I'll opt for the Texas-style 'cue at Cecil's next time.)

As you can imagine, after a heavy meal of BBQ and fixin's, you'll need to make some room in your gut -- especially if you plan on visiting the rest of the park (or going on any of its rides, many of which are very bumpy).

Thankfully, the restroom here is one of the best theme park bathrooms I've been to - quite a surprise, considering how crowded it is. It's right on par with the wonder toilets at the Lost Continent area of Universal Studios Islands of Adventure.

This is a large facility, on par in size with the Lost Continent toilets or the United Kingdom Pavilion bathroom at Disney's EPCOT theme park. It's a roomy, rectangular space, with a row of about a dozen urinals on the left side, followed by a string of about eight toilet stalls that wrap around the back wall of the place (with the handicap stalls being on the back wall). On the left wall is a row of wash stations, as well as a baby-changing area. All the toilets, sinks and urinals have automatic flushes or faucets, but the soap dispensers are the standard side-of-the-basin variety.

The decor is very Indian (from Indian, not "Native American), with lots of turquoise, green and purple tiles on the floor and walls, as well as some basic mosaic patterns strewn about. Very playful (not as playful as the bathroom in Conservation Station, mind you, but this place is going for a different feel entirely so it's probably not right to compare the two) and inviting. A few traces of urine singed the air (which I found to be a little more comforting than having the aroma of BBQ wafting through the vents here, for some reason) but outside of that it was pretty clean here. Quite a feat, considering that it's pretty heavily visited and I'm sure I'm not the only one who had to run here in haste after eating Flame Tree Grill's BBQ ribs and chicken combo plate. A top notch theme park bathroom.

The only bad point is the trip there. Not only do you have to contend with the dozens of other people heading in the same direction but you also have to watch out for all the birds, both on the ground and in the air. At peak times, I can see this place being similar to a birdie bomb range, if you catch my drift.

Marks out of 10:

8. Almost a 9, were it not for the many birds I had to contend with on my way to the toilet here.

Comments to the Management:

Great job keeping the bathroom here in shape and clean. It's a wonderful experience once I'm inside, but outside there has to be a way to contend with the birds. A trip to the bathroom should not be there adventurous, both in terms of getting there and being there.

After receiving your food from the order counter, follow the signs to the outdoor seating area located across from the kitchen proper. Walk through the tables,