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Friday, 26 December 2008

Old World Charm Gets Lost Inside Teutonic Bathroom at EPCOT's UK Pavilion

United Kingdom Pavilion Bathroom
EPCOT
Orlando, FL USA
www.epcot.com

Where is it?

This is pretty deep inside Disney's EPCOT theme park.

To get here, head to the United Kingdom Pavilion. Once there, look for the Rose and Crown pub, which is pretty much in the center of the pavilion. When you see it, look across the street, and you'll see a quaint little English garden set before a structure that looks a little like Windsor Castle.

There's a set of archways at the far end of the garden -- the bathrooms are inside those archways. (There's also a sign on the central street there, indicating which way the bathrooms are, as well as which way the Rose and Crown Pub is, in case you need to get back there and can't quite remember where it is.... for obvious reasons, of course.)

What's it like?

Like with the China Pavilion at EPCOT, the United Kingdom Pavilion houses a small array of structures that sum up traditional English experience for the non-initiated. There's the Tea Shoppe (notice the spelling of "Shoppe" -- doesn't that scream "English?"), the Rose and Crown Pub, a fish and chips place, some quaint gardens, windy streets reminiscent of a quaint Cotswolds village and architecture that looks like it was modeled after postcards of famous castles, like the aforementioned Windsor dwelling.

The pavilion itself makes for a nice diversion, but unlike China Pavilion, there isn't any attraction here (no movie; though there is a Beatle-mania-type show a few times a day) and no fine dining restaurant, unless you count the pub here as being fine dining. (It's got table service, and it charges $9 per beer, whereas the fish and chips place is just a fast food counter.)

The bathrooms look nice on the outside -- as said earlier, the architecture outside them is reminiscent of Windsor Castle and the like. Inside, however, they are just your standard mass market multi-person toilet -- nothing special. They're very hectic and busy too because they sit in the dead center of a busy thoroughfare between the France and Canada Pavilions, both of which have great fine dining restaurants and decent attractions to see.

Of course, given its bland interior, I can't complain on its lack of ambition as the bathroom at the Lotus Blossom Cafe in EPCOT's China Pavilion exhibited too much ambition and as a result created a somewhat unpleasant toilet environment. So there is something to be said for having a straightforward practical restroom on premises.

But at the same time you're letdown by the fact that the outside of the place has lots of personality and the inside doesn't.

Anyway, this is a long, rectangular environment. When you enter, you first face an area of sinks and counter spaces (for changing babies and such). Turn left from there and you see a long stretching room with a long row of urinals on one side and a long row of toilet stalls on the back, with the handicap stalls being in the back corner. (Why they are all the way back there, since it makes it hard to get to for anyone with disabilities, is anyone's guess?)

Regular stalls are average in size and are divided by beige metal stall walls; the urinals are separated by stainless steel dividers. Because of the shape of the place, and the fact that many people visit here, anyone in the stalls will have to endure lots of noise and activity. During my visit, I encountered lots of shouted conversations and many kids, who ran around frantically, bumping into things and having water fights. This was actually what I expected to experience at the Spiderman toilets in Super Hero Island in Islands of Adventure, to be honest -- just kind of a bathroom free for all, if you will.

The sinks, urinals and toilets all have autoflush (soap dispensers are manual, as is in all Disney parks bathrooms, it seems). This isn't a bad thing to have in such a frenetic environment. The place is brimming with spilled water and paper and other trash (even though it's frequently cleaned by the crew -- just too hard to keep tip top when this many people flush in, I guess) so the less I have to touch anything, the better.

The decor is pretty Teutonic, with an off-kilter brown and white-tile checkerboard pattern on the floor and white tiled walls with a black tile highlight. Again, nothing exciting -- pretty plain Jane, like what we saw at the Grand Canyon's Desert View bathroom or at TooJay's Original Gourmet Deli in Orlando. No bits of cozy English culture, no personality whatsoever. Soulless and bland and very hectic.

A little of that would have been great -- I'm not asking for something as eccentric as what we we saw in the bathrooms outside Westminster Abbey or Bleinhem Palace, or even something as high end classy as the majestic Lumley Castle Hotel, but at least some effort to mimic the decor of the Pavilion outside would have been nice.

Marks out of 10:

5. Would have been higher had the place not been so filled with frantic children, water, and trash and shown a little personality.

Comments to the Management:

Clearly, the cleaning schedule you've placed this place on isn't enough -- you need to double the crews here to ensure it stays clean, because it's a crowded mess as is. Also, adding some decor would soften the blow of overcrowding and messiness some. Look at what was done inside the bathrooms at the Paris Las Vegas for some inspiration, or the Lost Continent Toilet at Islands of Adventure.

Sunday, 2 September 2007

Craven Picks Over Remains of Old Toilet



Craven Arms
Brockhampton
Cheltenham
Gloucestershire
GL54 5XQ
UK

Where is it?

Easy this one. As you come in from the car park head directly left and virtually double back on yourself and you’ll be right there for the mens’.


What’s it like?

This place reminds me of the Fox in Great Barrington as one of those Pubs in the Cotswolds that have not quite pulled of the move in to the 21st Century. The menu shows some effort however can’t compete with the very many pubs that manage to give good tasty food with flair. Charging more might help them make this transformation, but I guess they’re probably scared of putting off their mainly aged customers. This is a pity because all ways around you end up with a bad deal. What seems cheap on the menu becomes bad value when it’s on the plate in front of you.

The same can be said for the décor. It’s not that bad all round, but with that little bit of effort could be something spectacular. The comfy sitting room is all OK if a little worn. The restaurant space tries to blend in with the 16th century cottage feel and just ends up dull and sterile at the same time with an expanse of tile.

I wish I could be more positive with the toilets. Well they’re OK. In fact let me give credit where credit is due. A lot of effort has gone in to them. There is a great orchid and pot-purée, great curtains too. Effort has been put in to painting the walls bright white and making them clean. In fact the toilet cubical is perfectly nice.

But here’s the rub. Taking a 50-year-old toilet and giving it some paint will never quite do the trick. The rusty radiator and warn sink let the whole place down. All the effort that would usually score highly goes to waste as you cannot ignore the fact the facilities are ancient.

The owner of this place fails to see things through the modern customers’ eyes. Like the fact that talking to the locals rather than serving your customers and helping out your rushed and over worked staff is not a good move she can’t seem to see that customer don’t want to see effort, they want to see comfortable and completely clean toilet. No rust. Proper heating. No unwanted smells. Get it? Probably not.


Marks out of 10:

5 for the effort and the fact everything worked.


Comments to the management:

This place has such potential and is let down by through no lack of effort (in the toilet at least). Spend some money and I’m sure you’ll get some good returns.