Tuesday 22 May 2007

Sadly, Toilet at American Signature Is Only Room Not for Sale at Store

American Signature Furniture
730 Sand Lake Road
Suite #100
Orlando, FL USA 32809

www.ashome.com

Where is it?

Hard to find. Because this is s a furniture store, the showroom contains dozens upon dozens of different room sets, all of them placed against each other so that the entire place looks like a massive maze of couches, bedsets, dressers, easy chairs, tables and the like. There is a sort of path going around the perimeter of the store, which helps you get your bearings some, but even that winds its way a little too much through the decor. Worse still, the place's army of commission-hungry salesmen are found at every turn, waiting for you to ask them questions about the furniture.

If in doubt, or in a rush, just ask for directions. The salesmen will help you after they've been assured you won't buy anything. Otherwise, from the entrance, head up the middle of the store, trying to keep your direction as straight as possible through the sea of oddly angled furniture, until you get to the back wall. Once there, look for a small enclave with a small sign above it reading "Restrooms." If you reach the Customer Service counter, you've gone too far left and have to buckle back. If you reach the mattress area, you've gone too far right. Good luck.

What's it like?

Despite the hassle of getting there and the tackiness of the showroom, the bathroom itself is quite a classy affair.

The toilet sits apart from everything, almost like a regally standing throne. A free-standing toilet paper holder stands to its side, almost like a first mate. The sinks are embedded in marble counter, and the fixtures are well-polished antique-shaped chrome and look like faucets found in a cozy B&B in New England. A stack of paper towels sits on the counter for you to dry your hands, and a smart-smelling foam soap is offered for washing.

Better still, the walls are covered with art, much of it African in origin (or at least faux African), making the place seem both elegant, peaceful, and cool. The only drawback here was a lonely paper towel I found on the floor -- clearly someone had missed the drop off but didn't bother to go back for the rebound.

Having said that, it should also be noted that the bathroom decor is also the nicest of all the room layouts found in the store -- and it's also the only one you can't buy. There's something to be said for irony, no?

Marks out of 10:

9. Even with the stray paper towel, this is one nice bathroom.

Comments to the Management:

Perhaps keep a closer eye on the upkeep during the day -- your customers, apparently, aren't nearly as classy as your toilet facilities.

Also, perhaps you should display or sell more bathroom arrangements, since (sorry to say) they are much nicer than many of your showroom sets.

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