Saturday 12 May 2007

Cafe Tu Tu Tango Offers Crammed, Intentionally Uncomfortable Facilities

Cafe TuTu Tango
8625 International Drive
Orlando, FL USA 32819

www.cafetututango.com

Where is it?

Kind of hard to find, considering the many distractions found here. From the main entrance, go straight, until you reach a central island where you'll find a local painter (or group of painters) hard at work creating new art.

From there, veer left of the bar and start working your way to the left of the building. While walking, look up, at the paintings on the wall, and look for one above a small hallway beside a waitress station that reads "Restrooms." That should take you there, provided a belly dancer or other free-floating entertainer doesn't lead you astray (which may happen).

What's it like?

This tapas bar chain offers inventive food, cool cocktails and a major bohemian theme -- best displayed in the countless paintings and other works of art hanging on the walls, and the many artists hired to create their works before you (which doubles as live entertainment here). Naturally, to give more authenticity to the chaotic bohemian mindset here, the place also houses an air of grunginess about it -- hey, this is a place supposedly founded by starving artists who want to pay $7 for a glass of domestic beer, so why not be a little realistic, right?

Ironically enough, nowhere is that better exemplified than in the bathrooms. The walls here are covered with a mixture of mosiac tiles and grafitti. The main area of the restroom, where the sink (really, just a large trough with oversized faucets) and urinals are located, is spacious and quirkly, but its also a bit too roomy, considering that most people stopping in for a pee aren't looking to be so out in the open when they want to do their business.

Also, an empty easel stands opposite the urinal in that main room, giving one the impression that a painter will be along shortly to capture the moment. Ick.

The stalls are the exact opposite of that front room: Exceedingly narrow. I imagine those of us who have larger proportions will have much trouble doing their business here, let alone fitting inside. (I'm not that big and I had trouble!) Then again, this is a place designed by starving artists, so perhaps the stall size is appropriate.

Marks out of 10:

4. Inventive, sure, but the thematic ties are way too involved, so much so that going here becomes more bothersome than relieving.

Comments to the Management:

I don't mean to sound like a codger, but can you tone it down some here?